| The stars lean down to kiss you, I lie awake to miss you. ♥ |
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my longest blog ever---------- 想有面对大海,春暖花开的淡定Wednesday, August 11, 2010 10:29 PM First of all, I would like to say thank you to all the people that truly cared for me I have been in Abbotsleigh for more than half a year now, and i realised, that there are different types of friends. You probably never heard me say "omg i love you so much blah blah blah" to anyone, and you probably will never hear that from me, cuz i just don't. but just so you know, that doesnt mean i dont love you. Some things might seem so small to you, but it means so much to me.  Remember the first lunch time we spent together? You were troubled and decided to told me your "story" i probably didnt say anything, but let me say it now: im really thankful that you trusted me as a real friend! And remember those text messages? how i sent them right before you switched off your phone? it was probably nothing big too you, but you know, i felt that someone truly cares for me :) im so gald that we grew closer since then so let's stay this way.  Remember that day when we all stood in the locker room and you talked about your true feelings? It was a short conversation, but i felt like that you included me as your close friend :) honestly, i didnt expect you to tell me what you felt on certian things, cuz i think of you as someone that is sweet and caring, but would hide true feelings deep inside. (not in a bad way!) Im really really thankful that you trust me, and i just want you to know that im always here for you okay?  Remember the shooting stars we saw at the camp? It was so pretty :) Everyone said it's not real, but we sat down facing each other and made wishes. remember how i shouted "it IS a shooting star, don't you burst my bubble!"to everyone? to the people that believes in shooting stars- thank you for believing in it with me so i won't feel so lonely when looking into the night sky :)  Sometimes i feel really included around the people that im comfortable with even if its something tiny which means little to you. Like a hug that made me say "ok ok, stop now, i cant breathe!", or a really warm welcome "Hey Angel!" in the morning, or a song that you keep singing and made me sing along with you, or a slap on my butt (*cough) that made me go "Hey!" or laughing at my egg+cheese+ham+butter+peanut butter+vegemite OR "whats-wrong-with-your-parents!"sandwich (seriously, as i told you, there is nothing wrong with my parents, it taste alright actually...)  but sometimes i dont know where i belong I treid to follow but couldn't find a spot that fits me. I started to think that im split in two, the other half of me is floating in the sky, looking at this world through her own eyes, accepting what happens, and dont even bother to change it.  There has been a lot going on lately family, school, life... I thought after what i have been through in my 14 years, I would be strong enough to face whatever comes in my life but I guess I was wrong.  But that's okay. Im just a bit tired now. So im gonna step back for a while, until i get my energy back, or let's say, recover.  I know life is not a fairy tale but I do believe in magic. |